Parent Perspective

An early school memory of mine involves the idea of perfection. It was during a third grade spelling test. One of the words suddenly looked unfamiliar when I wrote it down, and I gaped at my friend across the table desperately, so she wrote the word on a scrap of paper and slid it over to me. I paused just a beat, considering if cheating was the right thing to do, but I justified it, because the most important thing was getting all of the words correct.

This pursuit of perfection played out in my life in countless ways – never playing a team sport, because I wasn’t athletic enough; changing majors from engineering to “undeclared” when I got a B in my intro class; generally wallowing in self-reflection and going spiritually cross-eyed from the effort. Even after I became a Christian, if someone had pointed out this perfection as a glaring sin of idolatry, I would have said, “It’s OK, I can fix that.”

The problem, of course, is that I’ll never be perfect, and pursuit of that keeps my eyes off of the One who is. 

Where we want to fix our eyes – and teach our children to fix their eyes – is one of the biggest reasons that my husband and I chose Augustine Classical Academy for our children. 

Our daughters, Adalynn, kindergartener, and Laila, third grader, have attended ACA since preschool. We have loved the teachers, the curriculum, the four-day week (yah for pajama Fridays!), but most of all, we appreciate how God’s sovereignty and goodness is woven into everything, from class subjects, to lunchtime, to field trips.

There is a tension in striving for excellence, while also embracing the struggle that comes from a rigorous curriculum. Or maybe it’s larger than that:  the struggle of growing and maturing. While it is far too easy for students to turn inward and examine all the ways they need to improve, or turn outward and compare test scores, ACA is intentional about pointing the gazes of students, teachers, and parents to God. 

Teachers pray with parents before parent/teacher conferences, hymns are sung in chapel and the lunchroom, scriptures are memorized, and beauty and goodness are unearthed as students study things like Greek gods and goddesses, the four seasons, and math facts.

My girls are being rooted in truth, while rooting for the truth – whether that means digging for it in a literature book or cheering for it when they see it.

C.S. Lewis points out in Mere Christianity that rooting for the truth still includes a goal of perfection: “… you must realize from the outset that the goal towards which He is beginning to guide you is absolute perfection, and no power in the universe, except you yourself, can prevent Him from taking you to that goal.” Check it out, next time you want to feel both unbelievably miniscule and utterly beloved. That guy’s got some zingers.

But I think God is just as pleased by the stumbling, arduous toil of learning and failing and trying again as we are awed by the polished product – the zinger – of someone who has put in the work. And that work is never done. 

While my husband and I attended public schools, in some ways, we are being classically educated now. Adalynn gently but firmly corrects my cursive – and asks me to try again until I get it right – and Laila quizzes us on Latin words at the dinner table.  No seconds or leaving the table until we get them all correct. Our children are learning to work hard and aspiring to get better, not to meet perfection and find an identity in their accomplishments, but to honor and praise a good God who created and ordered the universe just so.

I am thankful for ACA, where my children can flourish with their eyes fixed on God, or more accurately, the chance to look back up after every blink. 

Is it perfect? ‘Course it isn’t perfect. But it is good.